Thursday, December 13, 2007


What a time in history we are seeing. Ideally we don't have a chance anymore with the past. The good news is that time is in the hands of God and for those with dreams, remember Joseph Gen 37:5, he had a dream too…..vs. 9, and another dream….


In the year 2007, many of us probably were led to make decisions based on other people opinions. Today, we have a chance to look back and say with the Psalmist that Lord, you have given hear to all our prayer, you've been my King and My God and most important after you've heard me, you enabled me to look up Ps 5:1-3 paraphrased.


The point is, do we look at God as our source or do we entirely look at other people as the ones to aid our lives, to help us make decisions. Fellowship is necessary; but it does not supersede our need for God in us.


In the year 2007, many of us failed in some issues. Do we realize that failure helps to understand our humanness and that we need to rely on God more? If you failed this year, it wasn't because God was not aware. Indeed he was. But we need to take stride of every development in our lives and move forward rather than be discouraged.

To all of us lets make the best decision in our lives not based on our failures, to remain failed, but based on learning from our past, and holding to the original dream given to us by our Lord.

There is good reason for everything today. There will be good reason for everything tomorrow. What we do today will determine that reason.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

happy birthday to me; the private party

when the sun awakes the earth around it seems to come forth with life. the people who are permitted to see it awaking are so privileged for the sight is awesome, the peace is like no other.....

have you ever noticed that even when a baby is born, the sun moves on with its business like nothing is different. the baby's cry notwithstanding does not jolt the sun into darkness.....

so it is with a day, so unique that gave birth to you. how be it that on that glorious day God gave you all you needed in itself........

you are a light...a powerful you started shining. you are the blessed of the Lord. your life is God's.....

the earth rotates around you....the rest of us are the earth. we get life from seeing you, hearing you talk, hearing you laugh and all that......

happy birthday to you

There is good reason for everything today. There will be good reason for everything tomorrow. What we do today will determine that reason. Joepraise!!

Friday, September 21, 2007

Kenyans!!!!Wanachana na hawa!!!

Very hilarious!!!

"From a Njoro School Teacher
... Nani huyo ananyonya moto??(who is smoking)"

"From a Nyeri high school grammar teacher:
"The girl goes to school, goesn't she?"

"From a Kianyaga High School Teacher:
"Both of you three, come here!"

"From Pangani Girls geography teacher in a Geography class:
"In a natural forest, there are many trees(many different
Species) but in a man made forest, there is only one tree (One Species)"

"From St. Georges Secondary geography teacher in a Geography

"the ass is lound?" meaning the earth is round

"From the headmaster of Kerugoya High School.He comes in the
staff room panting and says:

A male cow was running after me" (A bull had been chasing him)

An Irate teacher to student: ( Nanyuki High School )
"Tomorrow I want you to come with your father, your
mother and both your parents

Heard at a bar somewhere in western province, the
stronghold of the Luhya:

"'You can't me!' - translated from,'Huniwezi!'

From a student composition in high school:
"the car beat the corner in speed and then fell over and its
legs faced up (gari ilipiga kona halafu ikaanguka na miguu ikaanglia juu
-- sheng)"

A kyuk once told the butcher:
"Forgive for me a kilo of meat with holy paper.
(njohera kilo ya nyama na karatathi gatheru)" -All kikuyuz
this is obviously the winner au vipi?

On seeing twins enter his office, the assistant director in
Starehe said:

"You look together; are you twice?"

In Kagumo High the deputy principle praying for the Mtongwe
disaster victims:

"Rod(LORD) help those who(paused for a moment)

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

sequel to homesick

do you want me to tell you well done when you come home?

do you want a word from me of joy at your success?

you have what it takes to please me. you have what it takes to be the best. you have what it takes to be a light and salt in your generation.

does a light bulb refuse to light up when its powered to the source and its not blown?

you are to me a vessel in my hands. when you come home i want to hear great music from you, cos my hands presence on you have produced great rhythm and praise.

when i welcome you home....i see you, coming, happy, victoriuos, overcoming, succesful....all i will tell you is good and faithful servant.....

Well done!

By joyunspeakable to life's mysteries at 9/13/2007 03:28:00 PM

Thursday, September 13, 2007

the flu and the fool

i had the unfortunate event of catchin a cold and i thought it was going each day.....then i realised how much nagging it can be....always a running nose, that never seems to tire to bring out the waters....

i had the unfortunate incidence of catching a was going on and on. i took tablets to cool it off only for it to come back shortly.

i had the unfortunate incidence of sleeping under a leaking roof one was the most disgusting thing i have ever witnessed...because i was deep in sleep...then one by one, drops of ice were falling on my head, so i dreamt.

i had the unfortunate incidence of being chased by dogs, canines, real ones; because i had traversed their matter how i ran, it seemed i was too slow.

then i got to much of a running nose i am to the King of Kings, a running fever, a roof that he mends only for it to matter how far i ran into sin, God's presence is ever their, so i can not hide the little things that cause him some headache.....only he is God, he does not get sick...but does he not find me tiresome to deal with?

he turns the fool who is like flu to be full in stature and a pool of treasure
he makes the flu be gone and no longer be borne by those won by his love
he takes the flu and makes it disappear and rakes all the viruses and bakes them into nothing
so cool, no tool in his hands becomes fool, pool in with him, all the wool you have and certainly be free of fru and full of him

Saturday, September 8, 2007

My Mechanic

my car breaks down, i call the mechanic, he comes rushing down, knowing only too well that he will make an extra coin from me.

my radio breaks down and i carry it with me to the technician, he promises me that the problem is minor...will be done just within the day.

my telephone line is disconnected by a falling tree and the telkom guys tell me that they are too busy working on another line.....but we will connect you soon

two days later......

my car is still at the garage and the mechanic doesn't look like he appreciates my lack of mobility
my radio is all parts everywhere at the technicians place but he hasn't known what problem is on it.
there is still a dead silence on my landline......
think with me.....
mechanic, technician, doctor, etc....dont we play these roles sometimes to God? dont we keep on promising what we cant deliver.?

my God is no mechanic, no technician, no doctor, no lawyer...oops....he is God. And yes, he is not a banker too...he is just God. no lie is to be found in him, no false promises, no guile, no cut lines....

while we are yet speaking, he answers to our needs. thats faster than any communication in the world.

rom 8:30...

So, what do you think? With God on our side like this, how can we lose?
32 If God didn’t hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn’t gladly and freely do for us?
33 And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God’s chosen?

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Actual writings on some patient's cards at Kenyatta Hospital

can you trust the doctors with your life? here are some examples:
1.      She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

2.      Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

3.      On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.

4.      The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed

5.      The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

6.      Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.

7.      Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.

8.      The patient refused autopsy.

9.      The patient has no previous history of suicides.

10.     Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital

11.     Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

12.     Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

13.     She is numb from her toes down.

14.     While in ER she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

15.     The skin was moist and dry.

16.     Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

17.     Patient was alert and unresponsive.

18.     Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid .(!!)

19.     She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.

20.     I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.

21.     Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

22.     Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

23.     The lab test indicated abnormal over function.

24.     The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead.

25.     Skin: somewhat pale but present.

26.     The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

27.     Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Wangui, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.

28.     Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.

29.     Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

Fussy? Opinionated? Impossible to please? Perfect. Join Yahoo!'s user panel and lay it on us.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

My lover is Jesus

munyanya okwa munyanya okwa ni jesu
munyanya okwa munyanya okwa ni jesu

munyanaya okwa ritwa riawe ni jesu
munyanya okwa mworia wa mirimo yakwa
nu ungi ta munyanya okwa
nimbunite ruuji na maria ntoona
ungi tawe
uthongi bwawe nita bwa riua rikithuua

Friday, August 10, 2007

italian english for laughs

i thought this was too funny to let it go
A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an
animated conversation. An American woman is sitting across from them.
The woman isn't paying attention to their conversation at first, but her
attention is grabbed when she hears one of the men says:
"Emma come firsta. Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more.
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed sex obsessed pig," shouts the lady indignantly.
"In this country, we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa
tellin' my frienda how to spella ' Mississippi '."


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Visit the Yahoo! Auto Green Center.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

fellows who will never see the Kingdom of God .

An American preaching couple (Reverend Mr & Mrs Stumbles) held a

crusade in Kiambu where Njoroge, their Kiswahili translator, did a real

mess of the whole event..... and meaning

Rev STUMBLE: Everything comes from above.!!

Njoroge : Vitu vyote huja juu juu,

STUMBLE: So you see my brothers and sisters,

Njoroge :.......Basi ndugu zangu waangalieni akina dada,

STUMBLE: know perfectly well,

Njoroge :.....Na muwajue vizuri sana ,

STUMBLE: That all world affairs,

Njoroge:.........Kwamba mapenzi yote duniani,

STUMBLE: are successfull only if held from above,

Njoroge:.............Hufanikiwa tu ikiwa mmeshikana juu juu.

STUMBLE: Remember, faith is your pillar,

Njoroge:...Kumbuka kuuamini mlingoti wako,

STUMBLE: Keep it first and above,

Njoroge:..............uuweke kwanza juu juu.

STUMBLE: Let it run very deep and strong,

Njoroge:...............Ndo kisha uukimbize ndani kabisa tena kwa nguvu,

STUMBLE:Should anybody want to test you,

Njoroge:..............Mtu yeyote akitaka kukuonja,

STUMBLE:......will feel its work,

Njoroge:...............Ataisikia kazi yake

STUMBLE: Then from deep inside you'll feel peace pouring out,

Njoroge:........ndo kisha baadaye utasikia kutoka ndani sehemu moja ikimwagika nje,

STUMBLE: That peace will flow and enter even those you are with,

Njoroge:.......Sehemu hiyo ita tiririka na kumwingia uliye naye,

STUMBLE: and that peace will remain.

Njoroge:..............Na sehemu hiyo itabakia.


Njoroge:............ Huyo ni mwanamme

Friday, July 13, 2007

lawyer for free

i know a friend of mine who makes me really proud of her. She's been training for Law something.....frankly i think the joy of seeing an advocate come to the dock at a time when i felt i was going to be put in the locks feels the same way when extravantgrace appears. i feel locked up; extravagant grace gives vagrance and bliss.
variously i am without doubt about God's great love for me and his plans. Each time i fall, he stands on the dock to refute the same failure by letting me know i can stand. do you know a lawyer who could stand for free? that is trully extravagant grace.

FW: Nairobi pix--enjoy the beauty!!

Subject: Nairobi pix--enjoy the beauty!!

Ever appreciated how beautiful Nairobi is?

See for yourself!

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

I am not, but He knows my name
I am not, but He has pursued me inHis love
I am not, but I have been purchased and redeemed
I am not, but I have been invited into the story
I am not, but I know the creator of the universe
I am not, but I know I AM!!!!!!!!
I am not but I know I Am

You and I are tiny, Miniscule. Transient. Microscopic. A momentary and infinitesimal blip on the timeline of the universe. A seemingly undetectable alliance of dust particles held together by the breath of God.

The sum of our days is like a vapor-our accumulated efforts like chaff in the wind. Among us, even the richest of the rich owns nothing. The strongest of the strong can be felled in one faltering heartbeat. We are fleeting mortals. Frail flesh. Little specks. Phantoms.

If this makes you feel a tad bit uncomfortable, you're not alone. Invariably, when I talk about the vastness of God and the cosmos, someone will say "you're making me feel bad about myself and making me feel really really small," as if thats the worst thing that could happen. But the point is not to make you feel small,rather to help you see and embrace the reality that you are small really really small.

But thats not where the story ends. Though we are transient dust particles in the universe that is expanding faster than the speed of light, the unexplainable mystery of mysteries is that you and I are loved and prized by the God of all Creation.

Simply because he wanted to, He fashioned each of us in His own image, creating within us the capacity to know him. And if that wasn't enough, in spite of our foolishness and rebellious hearts, God has pursued us with relentless passion and patience, fully expressing to us His unfathomable love through the mercy and grace of the cross of His son, Jesus Christ

Monday, July 9, 2007

Fwd: FW: Pictures for Memorial Service for Rev. David Gichuru

Note: forwarded message attached.

Fussy? Opinionated? Impossible to please? Perfect. Join Yahoo!'s user panel and lay it on us.
Tribute to (Bishop) David Gichuru

I write this mail knowing that this was man who became bishop long before he was ever made one. I met Reverend Gichuru in 1988 when he was training at Kaaga circuit. Truly this was a great preacher, a man of God, he was full of youthful vigor and i'd agree with all those who are saying that his selflessness is unmatched.Bishop, sang parapanda, blew a trumpet and won us from our tender age. he joined our youthful groups and encouraged them. We saw in him the redemption of the Church from ancient traditions to very youthful oriented services. days are when he would encourage those of us in the late eighties who were deemed to be rebellious. he encouraged a young group of singers called 'revivors'. later in the nineties he was with us again in the group known as 'the fellowship'David, has kept in touch with me for all the time he has been in the states. He was a dependable man. he always wanted the best for his can we say bye to such a great man? People of God, beloved and won by the Lord, this is an example of what the Lord does to us.Grace, AMAZING GRACE, you are a winner, cos the Lord who took away Bishop from you, is the same one with you. you will be amazed at what GRACE, he will give to you.for all his friends, lets take courage in him who overcame the world. Let's celebrate a great man. indeed he was a BISHOP.
June 20, 2007 3:35 AM

Friday, June 22, 2007

diabetic condition

I guess life is a mystery. i know not many of us are blessed enough to know the joys of sicknesses. it is not one of those things anybody should want to have. 37 years almost sickness free is something to thank God For. However one week sickness is something to......thank God for. cos its only a week out of close to 2000 weeks.

i walked into a lab not knowing i was sick.....full of sugar in the blood. just feeling unfine. the doctors words surprised me,,,,,the levels were too high. soon it moved from 19.7 to 23.5. so i was put o a drip....and then the doctors started on this new lifestyle i was to lead......

flashback one month earlier, i had accompanied my colleague on a sales visit in town. we passed next to a coffee shop and and and i saw the mouth watering creamy cake. then i became self aware that i was craving too much sugar. i wanted a father of two? you'd ask...yes.

now i have to work against such and live a life without the sugars of this world. the priviledge though i have is that i am one of the 50% who know their diabetic condition.

chukua control while it is early and discover what mystery there is in knowing your true medical situation.

this is my daily measurement so far:
monday - 19.7, 23.5,16.7
tuesday - did not want to know
wednesday- 17.7,
thursday- 18.9 in a visit to a herbalist, he extols his virtues and prowess at such diseases. i dont take the herbs yet. i will come back tomorrow
friday-9.9 (really) , 10.2 i am over myself. do i still go to the herbal clinic or not. someone advises me against.....not one actually, three people...but the urge to believe the herbalist is strong....

keeep reading, i will give you continued progress as my herbs begin today. only thing is, i have joy unspeakable at everything.